Brent blog on cold, ole MacMathieu farm today. Chicken conflict headlines the news!

It’s snowing. Lots. Chickens keeping in coop due to deep snow and cold As a result, chicken conflict occurring.

This is so even though gate outside is open, and hawks have flown south. There have been no recent reports of fox or raccoons in vicinity. Kaya keeps neighborhood dogs, and cats, behind fences. Even so, squirrels, sparrows, and rodents threaten coop tranquillity. What about a possible passing weasel!? There are rare species capable of terrorizing whole neighborhoods, via infiltrating coops despite wire fences.

Kaya, a border collie, whose duties include home land security is often asleep on the job. She is presently snoring inside near me.

2017 chicken coop ‘cabin fever’? There is blood splattered in coop. Reminds me of movie with Jack Nicholson snow bound in Rockies, isolated in a plush hotel resort. The Shining? Or the Donner party in the Sierra Nevadas. Feathers missing from smaller hens. CSI via Brent presents ‘usual suspects’ of pecking order. Kaiser Soshay may be on premises in stealth mode? Possibly the chickens are at war with raiding rodents? Eggs disappear mysteriously. Corruption charges among chickens in coop?

An appeal to UN Security Council seems futile as peace keeping mediators. Local law enforcement disinterested in domestic squabbles. Not even Brent Almighty want ta be, and Kaya, as border collie patrol can enforce peace. I don’t have the budget, nor cabinet, to build infrastructure of a bigger coop, with luxurious space for all chickens. Taxes and limited income are a practical concern with permaculture. A megalo maniac on an urban lot can only accomplish so much in a day, or a few years.

So, let them peck each other. Perhaps, they will work it out, or the smaller, weaker, annoying hens will flee the coop to seek shelter elsewhere. The gate is open. It’s just that snow is deep, and wings are clipped. They are NOT welcome to migrate into my warm home. Tolerance for refugee homeless chickens, and their poo has limits with compassion fatigue. A rabbit resides in another greenhouse so there is no room in that inn’s hay, and fish sleep in tanks in other glamping greenhouse. Some how, it does not seem appropriate, with deities and spirits, to allow chickens in the sweat lodge? Maybe, if I convert to a cult of voodoo, the lodge will do? Temporarily, until spring thaw, and chicks appear.

So, basically, some of the hens seem to be ‘fucked’, despite Brent’s best efforts to maintain peace, with compassion, in the coop. As for mice, rats, squirrels, and invisible voles, well who cares what happens?! Do rodent lives really matter?! (Rhetorical, please don’t flame nor blame me for asking?)

I keep feeding, watering, protecting from predators as best I can do within reason. But, really, I can’t enforce peace on a pecking order of crazy chickens. They have their own culture. Some times they even have been known to peck the hand that feeds them! How cra cra is that!?

Maybe a rooster on premises might help. But I doubt it. Roosters are against city ordinances, based on past behaviors of disturbing the peace, (crowing like braggarts) and can cause other problems such gender and sexuality issues, bad attitude, cock fighting with spurs, and chicks resulting in population explosion.

But.. for Brent, an Ent… there are more important matters in 2017. So maybe I’ll butcher them all, and start over in the spring?

I am an omnivore. I am nearly an omni-potent potentate lord of the coop like a pharaoh or emperor. I am … a god of ole MacMathieu farm stead. Or that’s my delusion of self. I can do it if I choose. What do I have to lose?